I just needed to Breathe

T




Today I had some challenging moments as a mother. Lottie has not been feeling well for a few days. She had a fever Friday and Sat with a runny nose and hardly any appetite. Sunday the fever was gone, but still a yucky nose and no appetite. I know that this is nothing to be alarmed about, but today she was just inconsolable!
She would throw herself on the ground and scream. I knew she was not feeling well and wondered if her throat was hurting since her little voice was really hoarse and she had a cough this morning. I tried giving her many things, singing, playing, offering different drinks and snacks. I finally just left her on the ground to work it out for a few mins (all the while she is still MADLY pulling out fist fulls of hair) and went to the other room to breathe!! This honestly was the first time I had encountered a heavy feeling of inadequacy as a mother. What can I do??? Am I really going to be able to help her figure out her feelings and work through them? I know there must be more ahead of me, but as for today I was nearly in tears not knowing what to do! a little later I remembered this wonderful video I saw last week.
Read whole talk here.

Got Milk?

How fresh is your milk?? Around the area of Milan there are this little MILK vending machines. You can buy a bottle (plastic .30 or glass 1.00euro) another option is bring one from home (I saw someone even use a coca -cola bottle)open the little door, drop in your euro and watch the bottle fill with milk!

When I first heard about this system I thought imagined in my head little tubes running from the machine to the cows teet(thanks for the correction :) being milked... all going right into my bottle! It is not quite that FRESH, but almost. It tastes yummy and has that cream that settles on the top!!!

These are just a few other pictures taken on Gio's phone recently.

Inertia

Another peek into my head..... Have you ever been walking down the street, in a supermarket or shopping center with someone walking towards you- You are faced with two choice: 1. Move out of the way so they can continue on their course or 2. STAY and the other party moves. What decides this?? Well, if you want to read all of the scientific explanation you can find it here. Simply put: it is Inertia. I often think of this as I am out and about walking around the city.
P.S. There is a new Frock by Friday for May! If you are interested go here

sweet smells!

Today I have cleaned the house, thrown in some laundry and ironed. Giovanni comes home tonight instead of tomorrow!!! YEA!!!! He left last Thursday for NYC and yesterday had a short layover (3 hours) here in Milan before leaving for London, I went to the airport to see him and take the luggage that he no longer needed.
While he has been gone for me this past week has been really LONG and BORING with out him. However, being alone has given me time to think about all the things that will change in the next few months, the responsibility that will be mine (and of course Gio's), the happiness that we will feel as well as the anxiety of trying to protect a little child from the evils of the outside world! What is it really like to become a parent?
While I write this I am waiting for my pumpkin brownies to come out of the oven, oh what a sweet smell!!! If they are any good I will post the recipe!